Something can to my mind lately....friends or friendships as adults. I asked about it on my FB page last night and it was overwhelming to see the amt of responses I got. I've never been one to have a whole slew of friends-and as an adult expecially as an adult woman I've begun to look at friendship and the value of it. I find it incredibly hard to make friends as an adult-not sure if it's just me and being unsure of myself. I somewhat recently received a very back-handed complement from someone that I considered a friend about my business....stick with what you're good at. I tried to not take it personal as this person has a certain way with words-but honestly what kind of friend says something to you like that? It really got me thinking...how do you find quality friendships as an adult? I'm not one of the lucky ones that made life-long friendships as a child-it just wasn't where I was at the point in my life-I sheltered myself from close friendships for a variety of reasons...lots going on at home that I was embarrassed to have to share, depression, low self-esteem etc.
My son started school this year and I've met some parents that have similar interests, ideals and live pretty close to us but it's been difficult to take that awkward step from saying hi at the playground to going out for a drink or having them over for a barbecue, doesn't it always seem like other people have all of the friends they need, but maybe they're sitting there thinking the same things about you....
I sometimes freak out and have slight panic attacks about living life to it's fullest and spending time with those that make us most happy but is it something that just happens or is there a lot of work involved to find these people? And then what do you do with the friends that turn out to be not in it for you? I have one really amazing friend right now that I am so glad that I have and want more of those type of friends-someone to talk to often, share EVERYTHING with and KNOW they won't judge you in the least-or if they do, they atleast tell you that's they're judging you :)
So I'm not really sure what I'm going to accomplish by posting this-maybe it will give me the motivation to get out there and start searching for the types of friendships that I think we all deserve, will get me to step back and evaluate friendships, or to rekindle old ones or to be happy with the ones that I have right now...or maybe I just like to ramble.